These tasks are for fun. They are not meant to be malicious. They are not to be used to con people. They are exclusively for fun.
These tasks are safest/most fun when done with people you know personally or who you have a pretty good idea will not respond negatively/violently.
If you choose to perform these tasks, do so wisely. Seamonkey Ink is not responsible for any consequences which may result from your decision to perform said tasks....well, except for the positive ones.
Seamonkey Ink will try to issue a new task of the week via Twitter @SeaMonkeyInk each Sunday - bright and early while everyone else is getting ready for church/sleeping in. You are, however, under no obligation to perform these tasks whatsoever. In fact, some of them are fun just to image.
That being said, by performing these tasks you agree to accept full personal responsibility.
WEEK 1 Pop some popcorn then purposely walk through the entire building.
WEEK 2 Car Fun: When someone tailgates you, gradually slow down. When they try to pass, speed up.
WEEK 3 Every time someone says something you agree with reply: Pop Goes the Weasel.
WEEK 4 Car Fun: Vary your vehicle’s speed inversely with the speed limit.
WEEK 5 Frown & laugh at the same time.
WEEK 6 Car Fun: Roll down your windows and blast talk radio. Attempt to headbang.
WEEK 7 Randomly point and drop your jaw. Bonus points: Other people turn to look as well.
WEEK 8 Car Fun: At stop lights, eye the person in the next car suspiciously. With a look of fear, lock your doors.
WEEK 9 Whenever you’re complimented reply with: Well, I AM the Jabberwocky.
WEEK 10 Car Fun: Two words: chicken suit.
WEEK 11 Go in a store that sells alarm clocks & set them all to go off 1 hour apart.
WEEK 12 Car Fun: Write the words “Help Me” on your back window in red paint. The more it looks like blood, the better.
WEEK 13 Run down the toy aisle pressing all of the sound toy buttons as you go. Bonus: complain to store employees/other customers about the noise.
WEEK 14 Car Fun: Have conversations, looking periodically at the passenger seat when driving alone.
WEEK 15 Begin every sentence with “As my Grandpappy used to say”
WEEK 16 Car Fun: Three words: blow up doll.
WEEK 17 Press the Associate Call button & sashay away.
WEEK 18 Car Fun: Laugh a lot. A whole lot...by yourself.
WEEK 19 At an elevator stare at the buttons without pressing them as though you are confused.
WEEK 20 Car Fun: Stop at the green lights.
WEEK 21 Randomly fake laugh as loudly as you can. Bonus points: Others start laughing too.
WEEK 22 Car Fun: Go at the red light.
WEEK 23 Keep saying “Happy Birthday to Me” When someone asks if it’s your birthday today, look at them like they’re stupid and say no.
WEEK 24 Car Fun: Occasionally wave a stuffed animal/troll/Barbie out your window or sunroof. Feel free to make it dance.
WEEK 25 Make random sexy snake tongue at an elderly person. Bonus points: They flirt back.
WEEK 26 Car Fun: Eat food that requires silverware.
WEEK 27 Teach a toddler how to stick out their tongue at people. Bonus points: The toddler is a stranger.
WEEK 28 Car Fun: Pass cars, then drive very slowly.
WEEK 29 Sniff under your arm then say aloud “No it’s not me.”
WEEK 30 Car Fun: Sing loudly without having the radio on.
WEEK 31 Pretend to be petrified to ride the escalator.
WEEK 32 Car Fun: Honk Frequently without motivation
WEEK 33 Sit down in a public place and pretend to be having the damnest time trying to tie/untie your shoe.
WEEK 34 Car Fun: Wave at people often. If they wave back, offer an angry look and an obscene gesture.
WEEK 35 Cover the remote sensor on any device /transmitter on any remote with electrical tape. Watch someone try to use it.
WEEK 36 Car Fun: Prop of the day: mannequin.
WEEK 37 Walk around with money pinned to your shirt. When ever anyone gives you money & says Happy Birthday reply: It’s not my birthday. Bonus points: Walk away immediately.
WEEK 38 Car Fun: Ask people for Grey Poupon.
WEEK 39 Press the Associate Call button/wave over a salesperson. When they arrive complain you’ve been waiting for hours.
WEEK 40 Car Fun: Let pedestrians know who’s boss.
WEEK 41 Look startled in the middle of a conversation for no apparent reason.
WEEK 42 Car Fun: Look behind you frequently, with a very paranoid look.
WEEK 43 Call someone. Wait for VM. Leave message: “We’re calling from (insert local radio station). If you would have answered w/the phrase that paid you would have won (insert prize). Note: Call from an unfamiliar number.
WEEK 44 Car Fun: Cut off and restart your car at every stop light.
WEEK 45 Answer every statement for 10 minutes with “So what you’re saying is?”
WEEK 46 Car Fun: Hang numerous car-fresheners in the rear-view mirror. Talk to them, stroking them lovingly.
WEEK 47 When driving towards someone who appears to not be paying attention, blow your horn. Bonus points: They scream or jump.
WEEK 48 Car Fun: Lob burning things in the windows of smokers who throw their butts out the window.
WEEK 49 Call pretending to be from the property manager/home owner’s association where they are at the moment. Notify them that you’re having their vehicle towed.
WEEK 50 Car Fun: While stopped at a light, piss out the window/sunroof onto other cars.
WEEK 51 Walk up to someone and say a random nonsense phrase. Bonus points: Walk away immediately after w/o offering an explanation.