These tasks are for fun. They are not meant to be malicious. They are not to be used
to con people. They are exclusively for fun.
These
tasks are safest/most fun when done with people you know personally
or who you have a pretty good idea will not respond negatively/violently.
If
you choose to perform these tasks, do so wisely. Seamonkey Ink
is not responsible for any consequences which may result from your
decision to perform said tasks....well, except for the positive ones.
Seamonkey
Ink will try to issue a new task of the week via Twitter @SeaMonkeyInk
each Sunday - bright and early while everyone else is getting ready
for church/sleeping in. You are, however, under no obligation
to perform these tasks whatsoever. In fact, some of them are
fun just to image.
That being said, by performing these tasks you agree to accept full personal responsibility.
WEEK 1 Pop some popcorn
then purposely walk through the entire building.
WEEK 2 Car
Fun: When someone tailgates you, gradually slow down. When they try to pass, speed up.
WEEK 3 Every time someone says
something you agree with reply: Pop Goes the Weasel.
WEEK 4 Car Fun: Vary your vehicle’s speed inversely with the speed
limit.
WEEK 5 Frown & laugh at the same time.
WEEK 6 Car Fun: Roll down your windows and blast talk radio. Attempt to headbang.
WEEK 7 Randomly point and drop your jaw. Bonus points: Other people turn to look as well.
WEEK 8 Car
Fun: At stop lights, eye the person in the next car suspiciously.
With a look of fear, lock your doors.
WEEK 9 Whenever you’re
complimented reply with: Well, I AM the Jabberwocky.
WEEK 10 Car Fun: Two words: chicken suit.
WEEK 11 Go in a store that sells alarm clocks
& set them all to go off 1 hour apart.
WEEK 12 Car Fun: Write the words “Help Me” on your back window in red paint.
The more it looks like blood, the better.
WEEK 13 Run down the
toy aisle pressing all of the sound toy buttons as you go. Bonus:
complain to store employees/other customers about the noise.
WEEK
14 Car Fun: Have conversations, looking periodically
at the passenger seat when driving alone.
WEEK 15 Begin every
sentence with “As my Grandpappy used to say”
WEEK 16 Car Fun: Three words: blow up doll.
WEEK 17 Press the Associate
Call button & sashay away.
WEEK 18 Car Fun: Laugh
a lot. A whole lot...by yourself.
WEEK 19 At an
elevator stare at the buttons without pressing them as though you
are confused.
WEEK 20 Car Fun: Stop at the green
lights.
WEEK 21 Randomly fake laugh as loudly as you can. Bonus points: Others start laughing too.
WEEK 22 Car Fun: Go at the red light.
WEEK
23 Keep saying “Happy Birthday to Me” When someone asks
if it’s your birthday today, look at them like they’re stupid and
say no.
WEEK 24 Car Fun: Occasionally wave a stuffed
animal/troll/Barbie out your window or sunroof. Feel free to
make it dance.
WEEK 25 Make random sexy snake tongue at an elderly
person. Bonus points: They flirt back.
WEEK 26 Car Fun: Eat food that requires silverware.
WEEK 27 Teach a toddler
how to stick out their tongue at people. Bonus points: The toddler
is a stranger.
WEEK 28 Car Fun: Pass cars, then
drive very slowly.
WEEK 29 Sniff under your arm then say aloud
“No it’s not me.”
WEEK 30 Car Fun: Sing loudly without
having the radio on.
WEEK 31 Pretend to be petrified to ride
the escalator.
WEEK 32 Car Fun: Honk Frequently
without motivation
WEEK 33 Sit down in a public place and pretend to be having
the damnest time trying to tie/untie your shoe.
WEEK 34 Car
Fun: Wave at people often. If they wave back, offer
an angry look and an obscene gesture.
WEEK 35 Cover the remote
sensor on any device /transmitter on any remote with electrical tape. Watch someone try to use it.
WEEK 36 Car Fun: Prop
of the day: mannequin.
WEEK 37 Walk around with money pinned to your shirt. When ever anyone gives you money & says Happy Birthday reply: It’s not my birthday. Bonus points: Walk away immediately.
WEEK 38 Car Fun: Ask people for Grey
Poupon.
WEEK 39 Press the Associate Call button/wave over a salesperson.
When they arrive complain you’ve been waiting for hours.
WEEK 40 Car Fun: Let pedestrians know who’s boss.
WEEK 41 Look
startled in the middle of a conversation for no apparent reason.
WEEK
42 Car Fun: Look behind you frequently, with a very
paranoid look.
WEEK 43 Call
someone. Wait for VM. Leave message: “We’re calling from (insert local
radio station). If you would have answered w/the phrase that paid
you would have won (insert prize). Note: Call from an unfamiliar
number.
WEEK 44 Car Fun: Cut off and restart your
car at every stop light.
WEEK 45 Answer every statement for 10
minutes with “So what you’re saying is?”
WEEK 46 Car Fun: Hang numerous car-fresheners in the rear-view mirror. Talk to them, stroking them lovingly.
WEEK 47 When driving towards
someone who appears to not be paying attention, blow your horn. Bonus
points: They scream or jump.
WEEK 48 Car Fun: Lob
burning things in the windows of smokers who throw their butts out
the window.
WEEK 49 Call pretending to be from the property manager/home
owner’s association where they are at the moment. Notify them
that you’re having their vehicle towed.
WEEK 50 Car Fun: While stopped at a light, piss out the window/sunroof onto other
cars.
WEEK 51 Walk up to someone and say a random nonsense phrase. Bonus points: Walk away immediately after w/o offering an explanation.